Because someone picked me up - 2

Currently listening: True Worshippers (Youth) - Jadi SepertiMu

"Ubah hatiku, seputih hatiMu
Setulus salibMu, kasihMu Tuhan
Biar mataku, seperti mataMu
Pancarkan kasihMu, ku mau jadi sepertiMu."

We watched a movie about Ron Clark, a dedicated teacher who left the comforts of his small town, to take up a teaching position in a problematic classroom at one of New York's troubled neighbourhood schools. I think most people (even myself) would have blown our tops having to deal with such hopeless kids who show no respect and go all out to drive you nuts. In other words, almost everybody has given up on them.

Nevertheless, able to see how this teacher was willing to go through great lengths and try all sorts of methods, even making a fool out of himself, in order to win the hearts of the students and help them achieve their full potential. Eventually by taking personal interest in them, he managed to bring forth change, and the worst class of the school ended up scoring the highest marks among other schools in the state for their exams.

God never gave up on us. Today, as Romans 5:8 put it that Christ died for us while we were still sinners, I'm especially thankful for those in my discussion group:
a) D*, for sharing how from being a stubborn person, what led to his decision to come to know God, and how his life was being transformed gradually in the process. Unexpectedly, he also apologised for being harsh to me in the past, when I initially tried to bring him to church.
b) C*, how despite her own nature of being a resentful person, God gave her the courage to take the 1st step to apologise (even though it's not entirely her fault) and forgive a good friend of hers, who had caused much personal hurt and grief. Could see that it was not an easy process, but it always starts from one person's willingness to let go.

Of late night patient hunts,festival of light and gifted hands

1. Was planning to clerk an IVDU patient who is under psychiatric evaluation for my log book. Patient went out for a walk. Guess I'll come back tomorrow, since it's already 10.30pm.
Update: Had a chat with the patient,nice guy whom was actually married with 4 children - he did shared about his life as a former drug addict for 10 years, sleeping by the drains for months and being in-and-out of jail for years - which was why he did not get to see his daughter when she was born until she was 2 years old. Despite this, his wife stood by him for the past 15 years. He was admitted for splenomegaly, pain on his back and ribs, and there was a heart murmur. The diagnosis on the chart mentioned infective endocarditis, with vegetation on the aortic valve, and he is on antibiotics. Last week, test results came back that he was HIV positive, but his CD4 has yet to hit <200. I asked him indirectly whether he had any medical illness, but he said no - either he knew and preferred not to talk about it, or nobody has informed him of his condition..

2. Happy Deepavali, and have a wonderful long weekend :-)


3. Benjamin Carson starts out life with everything against him: an African American child from a single parent home with failing grades at school, ridiculed by others, glued to the television screen, and in need of glasses. But his mother, who dropped out in the third grade, experienced financial struggles, and at one stage was hospitalised for depression, never gave up on him, but instead started making decisions for him and his brother, shutting off their TV habits and ordering them to read two books per week from the library and writing a report of what they read, and Ben started developing his intelligence, imagination and belief in himself. Despite the odds, she also moves them to better schools, as Ben eventually tops the class.

He learns to spell, explore the world of books, grows in creativity. But he also begins to mix with the wrong crowd, and as a result of his short temper, nearly killed somebody. He runs to his room and cries out to God, praying for deliverance from his temper.

The foundation his mother helped to lay in his early days would later proved to be a driving force, as with hard work and a strong desire, he gets a scholarship to college, passing the exam which enables him to enter medical school. Carson faces adversity from fellow doctors and students while working at Johns Hopkins Hospital in MD. It is here he performed a surgery as a resident without attending supervision, risking his medical career to save a man's life. At one point, he also had to deal with the loss of his twins. Eventually it came to a point where he was tasked with performing a complex surgery to separate 2 7-month old German conjoint twins, and he worked out a miracle with success. Today, he is one of the world's leading neurosurgeons, and a professor and director of paediatric neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins University Hospital.

wei zhu lai mong xiang- ending -
Wei Zhu Lai Mong Xiang (Dream for the Lord)
1st verse
xiang pian li, er shi di mo yang
(The face of my childhood in the photo)

ji li zhe, nian shao di shi guang
(Reminiscing the days of my youth)

ceng jing zai ni wo di xin zhong
(For it has crossed my heart)

yao deng shang yue liang yao fei yue tai ping yang
(To go to the moon, to cross the oceans)

2nd verse
duo nian hou, wo men dou cheng zhang
(Years later when we are all grown up)

gao bie liao, qing se he mi wang
(To say goodbye to immaturity and uncertainty)

ceng jing zai ni wo di xin zhong
(For it has crossed my heart)

bian zhi di meng xiang, shi fou yi yi wang
(Our knitted dreams have they been forgotten)

Chorus
ren sheng di li xiang shi wei zhu fa guang
(Oh, our lifelong ambition is to shine for the Lord)

shi qu lei shui, shi wo men geng jian qiang
(The tears wiped away served to make us stronger)

lu yi ran man chang, bie shi qu pan wang
(Though the road is long, do not lose hope)

tong ku shi, ji de you zhu zai ni shen pang
(Remember that God is with you when you are in pain)

wei zhu lai meng xiang, wei zhu lai fa guang
(To dream for the Lord, to shine for the Lord)

sui ran you cuo zhe dan, wo bu yong ju sang
(Though setbacks will come, but I need not be sad)

zhu shi wo li liang, zhu zhi yin fang xiang
(The Lord is my strength, the Lord shows the way)

wo men di ri zi you meng xiang
(We have dreams in our lives)

you can lan di yang guang
(With bright rays of sunshine)

Of bus rides and movies

I'm back in Kuantan for around a week for the Hari Raya break. Interestingly enough, the 6-hour bus ride this time turned out to be a quiet one, but past 7pm, 1st time seeing the breaking of fast in the bus, when the driver switched on the lights and left them on for a while so that those who were fasting can have their meals. Well, something different from my previous 2 bus rides, which consisted of conversations; one with an aunty visiting her niece in Klang during the bus ride to KL, another with a mother and son while stopping by in Mersing for an early dinner.

On a separate note, I remembered a movie we watched during YA some time back, titled "Freedom Writers". It was based on a true story. It's amazing how 1 person can make a difference in the lives of others by continuing to believe in their potential.

Plot
The film opens with footage of the Los Angeles riots of 1992 and introduces Eva (April Lee Hernández), a Latina whose father was wrongly arrested for supposed retaliation to a drive-by shooting. She is initiated in a gang, and only goes to Wilson High School because her choice was to either go to boot camp or go to school. The Long Beach high school and its area are the place of a gang war, where hatred and racism is abound. Meanwhile, naive first-time teacher Erin Gruwell (Hilary Swank) gets a job teaching freshman English at Wilson High School. Her first day at school is a shock to her, as she sees a fight almost break out in her classroom and a full scale gang battle at the school. Her students do not obey her and continuously talk back to her.

One night, Eva and a Cambodian refugee, Sindy (Jaclyn Ngan), find themselves in the same convenience store. Another student, Grant Rice (Armand Jones), is frustrated at losing an arcade game and demands a refund from the owner. When he storms out, Eva's boyfriend attempts a driveby shooting on him, accidentally killing Sindy's boyfriend. As Eva is a witness, she must testify at court; she intends to protect her own kind in her testimony.

At school, Gruwell intercepts a racist drawing of one of her students, and uses it to teach them about the Holocaust. Despite various challenges, she gradually begins to earn their trust, and buys them composition books to record a diary, in which they talk about their experiences of being abused, seeing their friends die, and being evicted. Determined to reform her students, she takes two part-time jobs to pay for more books and spends more time at school, to the disappointment of her husband (Patrick Dempsey). Her students start to behave with respect and learn more, and a transformation is especially visible in one of her students, Marcus (Jason Finn). She invites several Holocaust survivors to talk with her class about their experiences, and takes them on a field trip to the Museum of Tolerance. Meanwhile, her unorthodox teaching methods are scorned by her colleagues and racist department chair Margaret Campbell (Imelda Staunton). The next year comes, and Gruwell teaches her class again for sophomore year.

In class, when reading The Diary of a Young Girl, or Anne Frank's diary, they decide to invite Miep Gies over to talk to them. Initially, the task seemed impossible, but after working together to organise a fundraising event which gained publicity in the local media. They raised enough money to send her over, and she tells them her experiences hiding Anne Frank. When Marcus tells her that she is his hero, she denies it, claiming she was merely doing the right thing. Her denial causes Eva to rethink lying during her testimony. When she testifies, she finally breaks down and tells the truth. Despite being assaulted by her own gang members later for betraying them, she and Sindy became good friends in class.

Meanwhile, Gruwell gives her students a project to write their diary in the form of a book. She compiles the projects into a book and names it The Freedom Writer Diaries, after the Freedom Riders. Unfortunately, her commitment to the students took a toll on her relationship with her husband, who divorces her. To make matters worse, Margaret tells her she cannot teach her kids for their junior year, intending to hand over the class to another teacher from a higher up class, but practises discrimination. Despite the circumstances, she fights this decision, eventually persevering to convince the district education superintendent to allow her to teach her kids' junior and senior year. The film ends with a note that Gruwell successfully brought many of her students to graduation and college.

You are very special

from Small Wooden People by Max Lucado

The Wemmicks were small wooden people. Each of the wooden people was carved by a woodworker named Eli. His workshop sat on a hill overlooking their village. Every Wemmick was different. Some had big noses, others had large eyes. Some were tall and others were short. Some wore hats, others wore coats. But all were made by the same carver and all lived in the village.

And all day, every day, the Wemmicks did the same thing: They gave each other stickers. Each Wemmick had a box of golden star stickers and a box of gray dot stickers. Up and down the streets all over the city, people could be seen sticking stars or dots on one another.

The pretty ones, those with smooth wood and fine paint, always got stars. But if the wood was rough or the paint chipped, the Wemmicks gave dots. The talented ones got stars, too. Some could lift big sticks high above their heads or jump over tall boxes. Still others knew big words or could sing very pretty songs. Everyone gave them stars.

Some Wemmicks had stars all over them! Every time they got a star it made them feel so good that they did something else and got another star. Others, though, could do little. They got dots.

Punchinello was one of these. He tried to jump high like the others, but he always fell. And when he fell, the others would gather around and give him dots. Sometimes when he fell, it would scar his wood, so the people would give him more dots. He would try to explain why he fell and say something silly, and the Wemmicks would give him even more dots.

After a while he had so many dots that he didn't want to go outside. He was afraid he would do something dumb such as forget his hat or step in the water, and then people would give him another dot. In fact, he had so many gray dots that some people would come up and give him one without reason.

"He deserves lots of dots," the wooden people would agree with one another.

"He's not a good wooden person."

After a while Punchinello believed them. "I'm not a good Wemmick," he would say. The few times he went outside, he hung around other Wemmicks who had a lot of dots. He felt better around them.

One day he met a Wemmick who was unlike any he'd ever met. She had no dots or stars. She was just wooden. Her name was Lulia.

It wasn't that people didn't try to give her stickers; it's just that the stickers didn't stick. Some admired Lulia for having no dots, so they would run up and give her a star. But it would fall off. Some would look down on her for having no stars, so they would give her a dot. But it wouldn't stay either.

"That's the way I want to be," thought Punchinello. "I don't want anyone's marks." So he asked the stickerless Wemmick how she did it.

"It's easy," Lulia replied. "every day I go see Eli."

"Eli?"

"Yes, Eli. The woodcarver. I sit in the workshop with him."

"Why?"

"Why don't you find out for yourself? Go up the hill. He's there. "

And with that the Wemmick with no marks turned and skipped away.

"But he won't want to see me!" Punchinello cried out.

Lulia didn't hear. So Punchinello went home. He sat near a window and watched the wooden people as they scurried around giving each other stars and dots.

"It's not right," he muttered to himself. And he resolved to go see Eli.

He walked up the narrow path to the top of the hill and stepped into the big shop. His wooden eyes widened at the size of everything. The stool was as tall as he was. He had to stretch on his tiptoes to see the top of the workbench. A hammer was as long as his arm. Punchinello swallowed hard.

"I'm not staying here!" and he turned to leave. Then he heard his name.

"Punchinello?" The voice was deep and strong.

Punchinello stopped.

"Punchinello! How good to see you. Come and let me have a look at you."

Punchinello turned slowly and looked at the large bearded craftsman.

"You know my name?" the little Wemmick asked.

"Of course I do. I made you."

Eli stooped down and picked him up and set him on the bench. "Hmm, " he spoke thoughtfully as he inspected the gray circles. "Looks like you've been given some bad marks."

"I didn't mean to, Eli. I really tried hard."

"Oh, you don't have to defend yourself to me. I don't care what the other Wemmicks think."

"You don't?"

"No, and you shouldn't either. Who are they to give stars or dots? They're Wemmicks just like you. What they think doesn't matter, Punchinello. All that matters is what I think. And I think you are pretty special."

Punchinello laughed. "Me, special? Why? I can't walk fast. I can't jump. My paint is peeling. Why do I matter to you?"

Eli looked at Punchinello, put his hands on those small wooden shoulders, and spoke very slowly. "Because you're mine. That's why you matter to me."

Punchinello had never had anyone look at him like this--much less his maker. He didn't know what to say.

"Every day I've been hoping you'd come," Eli explained.

"I came because I met someone who had no marks."

"I know. She told me about you."

"Why don't the stickers stay on her?"

"Because she has decided that what I think is more important than what they think. The stickers only stick if you let them."

"What?"

"The stickers only stick if they matter to you. The more you trust my love, the less you care about the stickers."

"I'm not sure I understand."

"You will, but it will take time. You've got a lot of marks. For now, just come to see me every day and let me remind you how much I care."

Eli lifted Punchinello off the bench and set him on the ground.

"Remember," Eli said as the Wemmick walked out the door. "You are special because I made you. And I don't make mistakes."

Punchinello didn't stop, but in his heart he thought, "I think he really means it."

And when he did, a dot fell to the ground.

Today, upon further evaluation and pondering, are we like the Wemmicks with many accumulated stars, stressed and concerned whether they will continue to receive any stars, and also afraid that somebody may put a grey dot on them? Or are we like those with many grey dots, who feel that they made too many mistakes or are unable to do much? When we see others excelling in certain things, are we able to remind ourselves that each person has a different purpose? (Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.)

(1 Samuel 16:7 - ...Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."). Funny thing is that we are always compared to as a tree. The tree has 3 main different parts; most important part is the root, then you have the trunk, and finally the fruit on the branches. The root represents one's heart attitude. Your being will eventually be linked to your doing. If the attitude is right, it will be anchored solidly to the ground and spring up a tree trunk which is straight and steady. Then of course, bearing good fruit will come naturally.

Inspirational message as a new dawn beckons