Monday, May 08, 2006

..as the autumn wind blows...







Another morning..looking out my window, i c clouds in da horizon..weather forecast: possible showers..da chilly, howling winds disrupted my sleep 4 da past 3 nites..well, can't really do much bout da weather since it's approaching winter (yes it's in Gods' control, yes it's approaching winter, no i'm not writing English literature..) strolling past da football field, i c thousands of birds, white in colour..hmm..either they r migrating or it's da mating season..such a magnificent site (shd put a photo of it next time when i edit dis post..) b4 hurrying 2 class, took dat short moment 2 admiring da fact dat He has indeed made everything beautiful in its time..

classes 2day was pretty free..1 PCL n 1 lecture..then go back n sleep..(kiddingz..need 2 study 4 upcoming exam..) b4 lecture, Fansisca and I were chatting about da research we had 2 do about da constitution of various organisations (ie MUMUS, WILDFIRE, AMSA, other MEDSOCS..i was thinking mayb IMU SRC?) despite looming exams..
"If possible, I would like 2 bcome da KL-JB rep 4 Monash Malaysia Med society.." I could c da enthusiasm n excitement in her eyes..I replied, "But we haven't even drawn up da constitution yet..we dun even know wat post will b available..how much time do we haf 2 do it b4 exams? When does Anna want it?"
"I duno. but it would b nice..i dun mind travelling between KL and JB, lialsing wif da clinical year sudents.."
I joked wif her bout petrol prices goin up n she said da faculty would probably haf 2 allow her 2 claim lar.."Otherwise u swim there lor.." lolz
i guess there's a thing or 2 to learn from her confidence..
"Wat bout u Gary? r u goin 4 any posts?" she asked.. Mau Ren and Alex looked at me, eager 2 know as well..Mr Poh declined 2 b involved..
"Err..see 1st lar.." was my reply..

Honestly, it's worth a shot, since it's a once in a lifetime opportunity.. however, gone were da yesteryears when i was xtremely hyper bout being a committee member 4 numerous clubs..i realised dat dat would do not much good (try too hard boosting ur CV n ur studies suffer, as i haf learnt da hard way in da past..).. sick of it dy..

then again, i paused 4 a moment 2 think..wat does God want me 2 b? does He condone my intentions? i remember praying 2 b somehow involved in MUMUS Malaysia..here i am, helping a friend 2 set it up and looking up stuff, but how far should i go?

helping 2 draw up da constitution 4 a club is one thing..running 4 election is another.. elections..i'm sum1 who xpresses myself better in writing, not speaking..(aka PR skills not so good..) one thing i dun like bout elections is dat popularity contest comes in2 play (aka talking ppl in2 voting 4 u n having better rapport wif more ppl matters)..u may b doin a lot of work n contribution but if da ppl duno u or dun like u they wont vote 4 u.. (not 2 say i dun haf confidence, i'm juz bringing up things which i may haf 2 overcome)..oso, wif da way da Monash course is structured (unlike ur '2 lectures a day then go home' system at IMU) being a rep MIGHT mean triple da workload,quadruple da stress n less time..

less time, hmm..one might argue dat it may force me in2 organising my time better (since i procrastinate) but 2 wat extent..i was amazed when I read Ivy's blog..taking things one step at a time n njoying da pre-clinical years, rather than ending up wif little time 4 frens, 4 sports, movies, mamak, even CF n God..sometimes in life we need 2 learn 2 let go of certain things, makes me ponder whether some things which i would like 2 do is really worth doin..(i know we ony live once)

looking back at da past 5 months, i believe God put me in Monash 4 a reason..i juz duno wat it is..i haf been truly blessed wif a proper campus (beautiful scenery)..a wonderful course (though hectic n contains less anatomy than i would haf liked)..wonderful CG members..wonderful city (Melbourne is near Clayton)..

The Road Not Taken
by Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood,
and I—I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

(i know..our SPM poem)..I juz realised how quickly time flies by..Things haf certainly changed (there were ups and downs) in da past few months or so..frens during orientation seemed not so close anymore in da present 4 sum unknown reason..work has piled up..exams, assignment deadline n taekwondo grading coming up.. frens haf been mostly international students (which r not many) rather than 'ang moh's..

when i go back 2 Malaysia, my present CG n da sights n sounds of Melbourne will b left behind as a distant memory..despite it probably being His calling, i sumtimes wondered whether i made da right step in goin 2 Monash..wat would haf happened haf i had stayed back at IMU..looking back at da fond memories of IMU, i seriously do envy u guys..nice pictures posted by all ex-fellow batchmates, from birthday celebrations 2 orientation 2 Mount Kinabalu 2 CF camp..can't really describe da bond u guys share..wondered wat else haf i missed..

I miss da apartments of Vista B Tower, i miss da view of Bukit Jalil stadium from my balcony, i miss my fellow housemates Shiva, Ernie, Song, Shan Jie n Chin, i miss da pak cik's nasi lemak in front of IMU every morning, i miss jogging n treasure hunt at da lake, i miss IMU CF N CG at Sarah's place, i miss taekwondo training, i miss da times when me, Renard, Joven, Kah Wei, Ning n other pharmacy ppl used 2 haf a gathering (order dinner from Happy Cook)..

back 2 da earlier post, wouldn't it b nice 2 b a bird roaming in a large field wif thousands of other birds..wif little worries..well, i guess i'll leave it all 2 God 2 chart what lies in the path ahead..

Proverbs 3:5
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight."

Philippians 4:13
“I can do everything through Him who gives me strength”

guess i've done enuf crapping..time 2 get back 2 work..
good luck 2 all M205 ppl running 4 SRC elections..

2 comments:

Sarah said...

Hi gary....Sarah from IMU sem 5 here!!! Found ur blog from lishun's comment box...

How r u???
Hope u r doing ok?? :)

GaRy said...

haha.. (doin fine ler so far..) i juz felt like typing stuff coz last nite didn feel like studying much..(my mood fluctuates) how bout u? preps 4 ur sem 5 ok? hope God puts u at a good PMS :-) help 2 say hi 2 fellow CF n CG members :p (p/s: does anybody want anything from Melbourne?)